Traditions are like everything else, some are good (National Shoggothood Day is lovely) and some are crap (nationalisms of any and all colours are a mug’s game). And some, like female genital mutilation, are downright revolting, to say the least. But here is a nice little family custom: Zorro the Wonderdog, absent from these pages for far too long, has come back to us to fulfil the specific task of inducting his great-granddaughter Morgana into the ineffable and infinitely fun art of Worm Charming. Everybody benefits from this practice; the young wunderkind pooches learn the art of extreme persuasion and the wee worms get charmed into a symbiotic partnership with the spiffing canines. The perritos must have someone to cherish and protect at all times, as it’s in their nature to care for and guard the weak and the helpless, and the gusanitos are forever shielded from all harm, as their vulnerable nature requires. I love happy shindigs, don’t you?

PS. This is a bit of a spoonful of sugar to pre-coat the palate for what is to come. With the autocratic designation (NOT democratic election, I must emphasize!) of the neo-Nazi* Quim Torra to the presidency of the Catalan Generalitat, I can feel the rage and the bile and the fire and the fury raising once more in my belly. Expect vicious ad hominem attacks soon.

*And if you don’t believe me…

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